Top 10 Things Not to Say to a SAHD

Not in any particular order….

1) So how’s the role reversal thing going?
First off it is not a role reversal for the umpteenth time… I still take out the trash, split and stack wood, mow the lawn, and paint the house. The only thing different is the wife leaves to go to work in the morning and I stay home for work.

2) Do you still drive when it is both of you?
What the heck is this? Of course I drive, and if I didn’t who cares. This has nothing to do with when we are apart. Just because I work at home doesn’t mean everything in my entire life changes. Get a grip and stop asking retarded questions.

3) Ask the wife if you can come by for a few minutes…
So now that I stay home I need to ask permission to go somewhere? It was like that before I stayed home.

4) So what types of food does your wife cook?
This comment implies that I can’t cook. It is strange also coming from a person who still thinks it is a role reversal. If they believe it is a true role reversal, wouldn’t they ask what types of food I cook? People just don’t think.

5) How do you do it?
Do what? This question is asked to me all the time, as if it is much much harder to watch children when you are male than if you are a female. Women have been staying home and raising children since the beginning of time, why would it be that much harder now that a man is at home? So how do I do it? Go ask a mother and whatever she says, that will be my answer too.

6) From another male, “Cool, I want that job, then I wouldn’t miss all the sports shows”.
This may be intended as a compliment, or it could also be a sign of misunderstanding the situation. First off it implies that you have a lot of free time to sit around and be lazy. Well, the truth of the matter is you may get to catch some games but let’s weigh in the sacrifices of changing poopy diapers, cleaning up puke and spit up, telling the child “no” don’t throw your toys, getting the child food when they are hungry and not when you want to feed them, playing with your child to keep their mind stimulated, putting them down for a nap and listening to them cry and fuss for 30 minutes at a time, and most of all keeping up with housework that you would expect your wife to do if you were the one bringing home the bacon. The only reason I would want the job is to see my children grow up. All the other work is simply terrible.

7) You need to get out more dude?
Yes, we all know this. Being couped up all day with the kiddos is a stressful job in and of itself. When you are around the kids 24/7 you begin to talk to grown ups in a strange way. You begin rhyming. Like, “Hey Jeff, look at the duck… check out the duckey wuckey..” “Say whaaaaa” Duckey Wuckey??? And of course you need to get a life, but the wife isn’t exactly rested up to take care of the children all by herself after a hard day at the office. So both of us need to get out more. So stop telling me the obvious and drag me out. I ain’t changing until you do just that.

So you stay home, huh? Is that all you do?
hmm… Is that all I do? I won’t touch this one…

9) So what do your friends and family think of you staying home?
This one gets to me all the time. Right off the bat they are implying there could be some obvious reasons why my friends and family members may disapprove of our decisions. First off, if they didn’t approve, you still have no right asking me. Stop prying. Secondly, are you telling me you disapprove?

10) Does your wife pay the bills?
This one is usually asked by closer friends than the average person. I haven’t had anybody really pry on this one but I have heard this one from close family and friends. If I worked and the wife stayed home, this question would not get asked. Another interesting situation is if I worked and the wife stayed home and I let the wife manage the money, nobody would see that as unusual. There are a lot of men who work that let their wives manage the check book and pay the bills. But for some reason, now that I stay home this question becomes crucial… hmmmmm

-sillydad